Wogan’s Thought for the Day
April 28, 2009 by Suzy
BBC South East News
April 28, 2009 by Suzy
Meridian TV News March 2009
April 28, 2009 by Suzy
Online SOS promotions
April 27, 2009 by Suzy
Online promotions and articles featuring you and your business for as little as £20:
Download pdf here: sos-online-promotions-270409
Choose your options from the drop down menu (prices include vat)
Would you like to be:
• featured on our SOS event website ?
• featured in our online magazine sent out to subscribers ?
• displayed in promotions via our online magazine and event site ?
Special low rates for SOS Club members
special features
We will write a special feature focusing on you and your business, including images and links to your website
This feature will be posted on our Starting Over Show event site for a minimum of 6 months
You will also be featured in an issue of our online SOS magazine sent out to all subscribers *
Only £70 (SOS Club Members only)
online promotions
An image/logo or banner with text on our website promotions page linking to your own website (max 60 words)
Also, a condensed version on our ‘promotions’ section of our online magazine guaranteed for at least one issue *
£20 (SOS Club Members only)
* Some statistics: SOS website March 2009
* 134,927 hits
* 42,851 page views
* 9,661 visits
more than one way to get divorced?
April 21, 2009 by Suzy
Thank you to Jane and Glenn who share their individual divorce experiences of the legal profession. They really made me appreciate the high quality of legal advisers we had at the Starting Over Show in March and currently on our website.
Join us on Facebook by clicking here
An amazing day full of courageous people
April 20, 2009 by Suzy
Information for divorce and breakup
Inspiration for Starting Over
Our SOS Event (see the video here) was full of courageous people starting their lives over. I salute you all!
Inspiration
If you are lucky enough to have met Julia Armstrong at the Starting Over Show in March, you will know what I mean when I say she is a dynamic and inspiring person.
Julia Armstrong
Pioneering coach, mentor, therapist – and international athlete
“Julia and her work are unique. She has a special gift in understanding exactly where you are, where you would like to be, and guiding you to a place where you can truly trust your inner self.” (Angela Dawes, co-founder, Micromuse Inc)
Click here to read more about Julia Armstrong
Listen to Julia being interviewed here…..
information
Why worry about a Will when a relationship breaks up? Jaci Godman Irvine: Estate Legacy Services Wills and trusts I work with Estate Legacy Services and I am a member of the KCC Buy With Confidence Scheme.
shared stories
“A desire to know, to be safe, and we misguidedly seek that safety within the arms of another who is doing the same thing. Or in the definition of a career, or in my case in sport – if I run fast I will be loved. If someone marries me then I am definitely okay and loveable……”
Relationship coach Julia Armstrong shares her own starting over story
See other personal stories here:
free mini book download
7 things NOT to do when getting divorced click here to download pdf sos-7-things-not-to-do-when-getting-divorced-april-09
sos live event news
The first ever UK Starting Over Show on 15 March 2009 hit the pages of the national press in a wave of positive publicity. What our SOS event proved was that ‘failure’ is not about having bad things happen to you – it’s about not doing anything proactive to improve the situation.
Our SOS Event (see the video here) was full of courageous people who discovered a wealth of information and inspiration and were able to take further steps in starting their lives over. I am proud of the event we created, and proud of the visitors who came and made it such an amazing day.
The winner of the Xocai healthy chocolate is………
John Wood of West Sussex, who completed our online survey on how friends and family survive relationship breakup. Happily, John has never been in that position himself but, like most of us (87.4% know someone going through breakup during the last 2 years according to our survey), John is keen to be supportive of others who are, and is glad to be able to point them in the direction of SOS Village.
What was the prize? Free registration license (WORTH $40.00) to be a Xocai distributor for anyone John knows who wants to have a home based business, and also A HEALTHY SAMPLE OF THE XOCAI CHOCOLATES worth £40.00. So John will enjoy some yummy Xocai healthy chocolate which hopefully he will share with his wife and family, and not just eat it all himself.
The results of the survey can be seen here: sossurveysummary-2008-09
diary of a sole parent
“I wrote in 2008 to a friend “We let our romance die without resort to a single doctor. Let’s not make the same mistake with our friendship”. One of the most shocking realisations post breakup can be that even if you strive for a healthy post relationship amicability, their can be little encouragement from outside forces…..”
Short Film: The first of its kind, and it’s just the beginning…… watch what happened on 15 October 2009
networking links
Wikivorce forums packed with useful advice and guidance Other great resources for starting over To find professionals who are all personally recommended visit CertainShops – professionals online
Promotions:
The Shoe Queen Stunning Sale is causing a frenzy,don’t forget to call 01342 824871 to make sure we have your size!
Why make a will? Or update one due to a change of relationship status? C.J.H. Consultancy Services can help
In partnership with:
Starting Over Show www.startingovershow.co.uk All the things you need to know about breaking up and starting over in one SOS Useful Information Honest Communication Personal Transformation Starting Over Show is part of Certain Shops Ltd. Tel: 0208 8167281 Textphone 18001 0208 8167281 www.certainshops.com Registered in England & Wales Company no. 5685386 VAT no. 880175810 Registered office North Park Lodge South Street East Hoathly Lewes E Sussex BN8 6DS
Why worry about a Will when a relationship breaks up?
April 17, 2009 by Suzy
Jaci Godman Irvine: Estate Legacy Services Wills and trusts
I work with Estate Legacy Services and I am a member of the KCC Buy With Confidence Scheme.
Without resort to a doctor
April 17, 2009 by Suzy
A diary entry from 2008 which is as pertinent on this day in 2009 as it was back then……
I wrote in 2008 to a friend “We let our romance die without resort to a single doctor. Let’s not make the same mistake with our friendship”.
One of the most shocking realisations post breakup can be that even if you strive for a healthy post relationship amicability, their can be little encouragement from outside forces. “Just let go and don’t invite contact”; or “don’t you think you are being a bit controlling? Why do you `need’ to stay friends?”; or even “isn’t staying friends with your ex a bit weird? After what they did to you?”
And there is the crux of it. Who did what to who – a determined mission to apportion blame, is a natural pursuit of the media, society at large and even your best friends. So striving to form a friendship with your ex, especially if the break up circumstances were morally unpleasant, can be quite disturbing to others. Just because you may have made the leap of understanding that blame,whether before the divorce judge or before your bedroom mirror, becomes an irrelevance, others can be uncomfortable, even downright threatened, by such an absurd need to be `friends’ despite it all.
Yet who of us has not had friendships that somehow withstood disagreements, long distances and even betrayal? Even if we need to create some distance for a time, love of any kind is too precious to be left out in the cold for too long.
The key to it all, for me, is accepting three facts:
1/ The old relationship must be allowed to pass. Some may laugh at Shamanic rituals of burying the wedding dress on the top of a mountain, but anything that helps you let go and move on is a gift.
2/ Understanding that forgiveness, of yourself or others, is not required. Some things are, let’s face it, unforgivable.
3/ Not expecting an apology of any kind is also imperative to success.
With these three barriers cast aside, suddenly the possibility of a brand new relationship becomes possible. OK, it may not have the trust and familiarity of your original relationship, but time truly can work miracles, especially if you have understood that people who are afraid, unhappy or under great pressure, will not always behave like angels. Understanding your own humanity and weaknesses opens up your eyes to seeing clearly the humanity and weaknesses of others, in a non-judgemental way – even those who have really hurt you. And accepting your own part in the dance, with humility rather than shame. Then apology becomes a gift rather than a justification for the other persons moral high ground.
And when the break up is without rancour and spite? Even more reason to `stay friends’, yet just as difficult. Ending one relationship and beginning another (for that is what is involved) can benefit from skilled advice. There are relationship `doctors’ out there who can see the patterns of behaviour, spot the scripting that we have of how we see ourselves and what we believe is possible of ourselves and others. They can help us see our relationships from another country, another planet even, until we begin to see that by changing our expectations, and asking the right questions, an `impossible relationship’ can become a supportive one. Those of us who have experienced parenting classes, or been through personal self development, will know first hand the miracles that can occur if only we allow them to happen.
When I am ill, I rarely visit my GP, but search out my own remedies, or seek help from like-minded healers who will get to the root of my sickness and help me to create my own cure. I hope I can find the courage to protect the special friendship I have with my current `ex’, by finding a relationship doctor who will help us to move away from one relationship and create a new one, through letting go, accepting ourselves for all our weaknesses and foibles, and loving each other without conditions. An ideal? Why strive for anything less….
An amazing day – 15 March 2009
April 3, 2009 by Suzy
The first of its kind, and it’s just the beginning……
Julia Armstrong
April 1, 2009 by Suzy
Julia Armstrong
Pioneering coach, mentor, therapist – and international athlete
“Julia and her work are unique. She has a special gift in understanding exactly where you are, where you would like to be, and guiding you to a place where you can truly trust your inner self.” (Angela Dawes, co-founder, Micromuse Inc)
“My own lessons have been hard learned! As an eight year old child I dreamed with my best friend Wendy of who we would marry, the babies we would have, the dogs and cats and chickens and goats too (I seem to remember!) in the yard. I also dreamed of running for England, running in the Olympic games. I dreamed too of being a publisher – a writer – involved with books all day long. I dreamt a lot!
I am 50 next year and in a way all my visions are in place – apart from the babies, although I have many Godchildren and nephews and nieces, so in some ways the babies are there too! But paradoxically the thing I am best at is helping others to find their true expression – to have a great relationship with themselves and so in turn with other people. My biggest skill is in helping others love themselves and start over and begin again and learn to create a preferred future that really does support the life they want to lead, to learn how to really listen to their true inner voice.”
Read more of Julia’s own personal story here:
Julia – relationship work
What is this thing we call relationship? Everyone would like to be able to engage and connect authentically with those around us. It is separation and disconnection that causes pain, and a lack of understanding that causes conflict, breakdown of communication and, potentially, a loss of love.
Working with relationship is the foundation of all Julia’s work. The starting point towards more deeply satisfying relationships with others is your relationship with yourself, and Julia can help improve this by working with you to develop an understanding of how you respond, why you think and behave as you do, and where you first got the ideas and beliefs that you live your life by.
Julia’s work incorporates, amongst other techniques, ideas inspired by the Imago model of relationship therapy, which is based on the idea that you unconsciously choose a partner with similar positive and negative traits to those who cared for you as a child, in the belief that this partner can help you heal unresolved pain from childhood. So many of us carry the pain of childhood and past relationships with us and so our scars are always ready to be activated by new situations, which in truth may be completely unrelated to where we are now.
If we understand this then an intimate relationship can become an area of growth as we uncover and heal old wounds and areas of pain. We have to know that another can reflect these pains but they cannot heal them for us, and that this is where conflict in any kind of relationship often originates. Key to working with Julia is promoting an awareness of this in both of you, helping you become able to support one another in the healing and growth process, and working to replace criticism, demands and disappointment with understanding and support.
Julia’s relationship work entails sessions with individuals or couples, or a mixture of the two, with the aim of guiding you towards more creative and positive relating. Whether you are in a new relationship and looking to ensure you create a healthy and happy partnership, or have been together for some time and are feeling stuck and in need of guidance, Julia will coach and support you as you take the steps to create a preferred future.
“Julia has helped us to build a positive relationship from the beginning and to make our communication positive and constructive. She introduced us at an early stage to the idea of the conscious relationship. That has been important in our understanding of how our individual pasts influence the way we relate to each other in the present. Julia has been there at each stage, guiding our efforts to develop the relationship we want to have.”
SW & NA, Eastbourne
Listen to Julia being interviewed here…..
For podcast interviews click here:
Julia regularly interviews and publishes audio podcasts of the fascinating people she talks to
Julia’s newsletter: click here to subscribe:
Full of valuable advice and good practice for living a life true to yourself
“Julia is a remarkable person so it’s no surprise that this is a remarkable book: vivid, intimate and wise, with the power to inspire that can only come from deep personal experience.” (Andrew Shields, Sport and Health Editor, Time Out London)
Running to Learn – Julia’s book: Take a look….
Running to Learn tells the compelling story of an international running career in which each step has led both round in circles and towards healing and awareness.
Through the many highs and lows of her life Julia discovered the skills necessary to perform at top level throughout times of difficulty as well as triumph, both on and off the track. Here, Julia shares the journey behind her unique and dynamic approach to life – the struggles behind the performances, her battle with an eating disorder, and the challenges of her personal relationships. Running to Learn shows how you can direct each of your own steps towards taking control of your life and moving towards a place where it’s perfectly okay to be you.
Does your business need some coaching too?
Ultra
Inspired by her experiences with ultrarunning, Julia has developed Ultra, a performance programme for individuals and groups in business. In a time in which uncertainty in the global markets filters down through organisations and into personal lives, Ultra offers a total lifestyle approach to achieving sustainable performance in every aspect of life and business.
The key to success in ultrarunning lies in finding what it takes to keep going, adjusting effort and approach to situations as you find them, and holding a long-term perspective on the wider impact that each step of the way has on the race as a whole.
Using athletics as a metaphor for performance in the workplace is certainly not a new idea, but Ultra is unique in that it highlights the importance of heightened mind and body awareness in achieving Ultra levels of performance, and the moment by moment skills associated with excellence that are equally vital to success in business and in life.
The aim of the Ultra programme is to instil peak performance at the very core of your organisation, both on an individual and organisational level. Focus is placed on an awareness of the physical and emotional core in the individuals who collectively make up the heart of your organisation, and close attention is paid to the relationships and connections that are vital to the day-to-day running of your business.
Individuals who take part in the programme will be given the tools to make performance a key part of a total lifestyle: success in the workplace will reflect at a personal level, and vice versa. The programme promotes authenticity, clarity, energy and integrity at all levels, leading to sustainable performance and an ability to react quickly and with confidence to whatever challenges present themselves, from a personal problem to a global crisis.
Using our experience in coaching teams and individuals, as well as the latest research in psychology and physiology, we work with you to find ways of attaining sustainable peak performance throughout the organisation.
The development programme we create together will depend entirely on the needs of your organisation and the individuals within it.
In Brief
* The work is designed to explore the capabilities of individuals, the culture of the organisation itself and the day-by-day interactional patterns within working practice.
* We develop an awareness of how to increase and sustain performance by looking at the individual as a whole, and the organisation as a complete entity, impacting on and benefiting from the performance of the individuals within it.
* Our aim is to align personal vision with corporate intentions and create sustainability, whatever the circumstances.
* We create a development programme with the client using an appreciation of what is already working as a starting point.
* The work is designed to be measurable, and diagnostics allow progress to be tracked.
* A physical programme can be designed to run alongside the development coaching, and we strongly encourage this.
Julia was one of our exhibitors at the Starting Over Show in March 2009 and contributed to a very powerful mix of information and inspiration that took the media by storm. See our short film of the day here:
