Vision for SOS 2010
July 29, 2009 by Suzy
Interview by @Sobk13
Dates for two more ‘divorce fairs’ announced
July 24, 2009 by Suzy
23 July 2009
Starting Over Show creator Suzy Miller has announced her next two events – one in London and one in Brighton and both in March 2010.
The first Starting Over Show in Brighton this year- dubbed a ‘divorce fair’ by the media – helped more than 500 visitors who travelled from across the UK and abroad to seek advice on a range of issues from wellbeing to legal and financial.
Created by single mum-of-three Suzy Miller, the Starting Over Show has been designed to help the thousands of people in the UK who experience relationship break-ups, separation and divorce and want to turn their lives around – and literally start over.
A number of exhibitors have already signed up for the events which take place at the Hilton London Metropole in Edgware Road on Sunday 7 March 2010 and Hilton Brighton Metropole on Sunday 28 March. They include: Jaci Godman Irvine of Estate Legacy Services alongside Mystic Housewife Jane Orr and Mark Robinson of Private Wealth Management alongside makeover stylist Gay Richardson of Style Me Confident - both examples of the balance of information and inspiration that defines the Starting Over Show events.
Other exhibitors include:Jane Robey of National Family Mediation; law firm Jeffrey Green Russell; James Pirrie from Family Law in Partnership and Charlotte Friedman of the Divorce Support Group; collaborative law firm Mayo Wynne Baxter LLP; mediator and collaborative lawyer Elissa Da Costa; Armida Business Recovery; solicitors Nockolds LLP; Lambda Mediation; therapist, author and international athlete Julia Armstrong; Scott Collier Photography; ‘Unwrapping the gifts of passion’ holistic coach Vena Ramphal; introduction agency Dateline Platinum; Divorce Online; Dummies Guides; Rhythm of Life interfaith minister Estelle Williams and law firm Bennett Griffin.
Like at the first show, there will be information and inspiration all in one place, as well as workshops and seminars on a range of topics. At both events, Mayo Wynne Baxter LLP will be running a free surgery covering all the options, including mediation and collaborative law. While at Brighton, Bennett Griffin’s team of Resolution accredited family experts will be offering free, confidential advice during 15-minute surgery consultations covering everything from achieving a fair financial settlement, to attending mediation to resolve issues about contact with your children.
Suzy, 44, came up with the Starting Over Show after her 10-year relationship broke down and she was left on her own with three young children and no income. The experience made her realise just how difficult it is for people to get the information and inspiration they need to get back on their feet.
“It’s time to stop expecting people going through relationship breakdowns to feel like failures. It happens to most of us as some time or other, and it is only right that we should not ignore others going through such life-changing situations but try and help them and give them a vision of a better future.
“I’m really pleased about holding the next show in London and helping the thousands of couples in the South East who are going through divorce or separation – or even thinking about it.”
Visit http://www.startingovershow.co.uk for more information and tickets. Suzy has also created a resource site at www.sos-village.org where people can find helpful and inspiring information and also share stories about starting over.
ENDS
Notes to Editors:
Suzy’s personal story has been featured in Eve magazine last year and in the July 2009 edition on Prima. She is also being featured in a forthcoming edition of the Observer Magazine.
Suzy is available for interview on 07525059634 suzy@startingovershow.co.uk
Or contact Suzi Christie at Blueberry PR on 01435 830031 suzi@ blueberry-pr.co.uk for more information.
WHO’S EXHIBITING?
Check out our exhibitors here: http://www.startingovershow.co.uk/index.php/let-us-help/information-inspiration/
There are two types of exhibitors – some offering information and some offering inspiration:
The Information exhibitors will offer practical advice and access to experts including:
Specialist legal advice around marriage, divorce, separation, family law and estates and wills
Family specialists that can help with issues around children and child care
Financial professionals who can offer specific guidance and recommendations
Business advisors
Public and Independent Advice and Support agencies
Practical marriage makeover experts for those who want to turn their relationship around
The Inspirational exhibitors will provide a range of people, services, techniques, experiences and ideas to improve your mental and emotional wellbeing
Therapists, counsellors and life coaches
Health, fitness and wellbeing professionals: personal trainers, makeover & style coaches, hypnotherapists, reflexologists and acupuncturists
Business and career guidance
Holidays and overseas opportunities
Fun stuff to help you enjoy and celebrate life!
WHO SHOULD ATTEND?
Anyone who has experienced or maybe experiencing a relationship break up or divorce
Anyone who has experienced loss of a partner, child, family member or friend
Anyone who is entering or has entered retirement or redundancy and feels at a loss as to what to do next
Anyone who has been affected by serious injury, illness, abusive or damaging situations and needs help to move forward
The show is for anyone who wants to start over in their life and needs a bit of help!
WHAT DOES IT COST?
Ticket are £3 each and can be bought on line at www.startingovershow.co.uk
For more background information – see our press pack at http://www.startingovershow.co.uk/index.php/sos-15-march-2009/press-pack/
or request a PDF version by e-mailing suzi@blueberry-pr.co.uk
Getting Hitched Information Pack
July 21, 2009 by Suzy
With all the talk from Conservative think tanks about bribing couples to stay married (£40 a week – is that really going to be enough?) and cooling off periods, and suggestions from other comentators on making it harder to get married in the first place, I think they are all barking up the wrong tree. Personally, I don’t think we should do anything that is essentially negative.
Anyone with children knows that punishments and deterrents only have short term effect. Why not make it easier for couples to have a long and happy relationship by creating a ritual around the preparation for marriage which includes, effectively, relationship coaching as well as practical financial and legal advice?
Not an ‘induction course’ but more like a spiritual non denominational rite of passage – taking the relationship onto a higher level – with a load of fantastic life skills weaved into the fabric of it. Just like getting a Home Information Pack when buying a house, couples could get a Getting Hitched Information Pack when they are getting married, a civil partnership or deciding to live together.
If you were to create such a pack, what would you put in it?
Could be nasty
July 19, 2009 by Suzy
Heads of state from more than 50 countries have been attending meetings of the Non-Aligned Movement in Egypt.
I saw the news on Twitter and thought “how amazing! A non-aligned, presumably free thinking organization focused on good ideas rather than tying themselves to some political or social dogma.”
And how relevant it seemed to me at this time, about to be interviewed for the “Ex Files” column in the Observer Women’s supplement. Because when it comes to relationships, I’m becoming increasingly less influenced by conventional ways of thinking, and learning not to just take relationships and pop them into a nice neat socially acceptable box, and create a Cold War situation where once there was love and harmony. Especially since the box for ex’s seems to be marked (and not without cause) ‘agent of destruction’.
The diversity of opinions on Twitter was interesting too. Let’s face it, from a traditional PR point of view, me sticking my relationships into print and not knowing exactly what my ‘ex’ is going to say about me, would be a crazy thing to do and if I had a traditional PR agency managing the Starting Over Show I should be no doubt told to stop being so reckless.
But SOS is just me, and my PR queen is @SuziPR who is amazingly supportive of my desire to just be, well – real.
CourageousLover
@SuzyMiller Fascinating oppotunity – see how you’ve grown/he’s grown. And in print for the public. Good luck.
@CourageousLover has it right – even if I’m being reckless, my ex is being very courageous. It’s one thing to share your stuff with friends, but to have it printed with a full length photo in the Observer Magazine is quite something else.
NeilDenny
@SuzyMiller Wow, I hope that Observer article works out alright. Could be nasty.
@NeilDenny is a Collaborative lawyer and keynote presenter/trainer on how conflict affects us as individuals and organisations – and he was right to point out how risky this article could prove to be.
But somehow, going through relationship breakup leaves one with a certain amount of courage – how can anything else (apart from physical death) be as bad? And of course, my ex and I are working – slowly – upon finding our way through into a different relationship. Needing to mediate with ourselves as much as with each other.
The Non-Aligned Movement was born during the Cold War in 1961, aiming to unite countries which officially expressed the wish not to be allied either with the US-led western bloc or the Soviet-dominated eastern bloc.
It now has 118 member states, with 15 observer states, representing two-thirds of the members of the United Nations and half of the world’s population. But it still struggles to have a voice.
Sometimes a relationship can crumble and bitterness and pain prevails, but given support, opportunity and courage, it can revive and become something else, something non-aligned and even uncomfortable to those who prefer things to stay in a nice neat box, part of a defined movement or belief system.
The interview is tomorrow morning. Wish me luck.
Press FAQs
July 2, 2009 by Suzy
Q. How many people attended the first SOS?
A. We estimate about 500 people visited but expect many more at the next shows, partly because the huge amount of positive press coverage. We even had a visitor from Greece who asked Suzy if she would “please put on an SOS in Athens”!
Q. How did you come up with the SOS concept?
A. There are fairs for people getting married, but nothing for those getting divorced – when they need even more support, especially emotional support. I discovered this when I was breaking up from a 10 year relationship with 3 young children.
Q. Was the SOS in March 2009 the first in the UK?
A. Yes, we were the first. I knew there would be demand for such fairs and I wanted to set a high standard, an ethical approach, as I feared that other event organizers would focus more on the divorce rather than the starting over, as had been done in the rest of Europe (SOS does not have any Private Detectives exhibiting, unlike other ‘divorce fairs’.
Q. How many people are you expecting at the 2010 shows in Brighton and London?
A. Now that people realise the SOS is a resource and that we create such an uplifting atmosphere, I am hoping for at least double the visitors we had at the first show in Brighton.
Q. Why did you choose those locations?
A. I wanted to create the first event outside of London to serve the people of the South East, where I live. But so many visitors came from London and the rest of the UK, I felt it was only fair to put on a show in London as well.
Q Are you planning shows in other parts of the UK?
A. I would love to create SOS events throughout the UK. It is important that people have access to local businesses.
Q. Who are you aiming the show at and does it cater for gay people too?
A. The shows are ideal for anyone considering divorce and wanting to know what is involved, and how to proceed in a way that helps maintain a healthy relationship with their partner irrespective of whether they stay together or not. SOS is also ideal for couples going through or even a few years down the line, who have unresolved legal or child access issues, or just feel a bit stuck! We are an inclusive event and welcome people breaking up from civil partnerships, which is one of the reasons why we chose Brighton as our first venue.
Q. Don’t you think you are profiting from people’s misery?
A. Does a doctor profit from other’s pain because he makes a living by helping others to heal? Our exhibitors include many who have been through divorce themselves, and are passionate about helping others to go through the process in a healthy and empowering way.
Q. What about people from different religions?
A. As an inclusive event, we welcome all races and religions – fundamentally, divorce and relationship breakup is a process identical to that of bereavement. Human pain has no cultural or religious boundaries. Our show includes the presence of non denominational pastors who can give support and spiritual advice to people of any religious background.
Q. Why do you think the first show was such a success?
A. The press and the visitors were expecting a miserable, depressing event – or something that felt very commercial. They experienced something very different! Visitors felt relaxed enough to chat with each other and share stories, and they knew they were somewhere brimming over with information, inspiration, and where no one was made to feel like a failure just because their relationship hadn’t worked out as planned.
Q: I’ve heard of some other similar events taking place – are you involved in those?
A. There are some copycat shows happening which demonstrates a real need for such events, but I am deliberately distant from other ‘divorce fairs’ because of the fundamental differences between our approaches. We are not a ‘divorce supermarket’ – rather, SOS is more like the friendly local organic shop where you can interesting and healthy alternatives to what is on the supermarket shelves (at our last event we had smaller businesses exhibiting offering everything from business start up opportunities, to sexy shoes and erotic chocolates!). Consequently, the atmosphere of our shows is friendly and relaxed, and there are no private detectives (the only UK divorce fair so far that can make that claim).
Q. How do you respond when people say you are helping to promote divorce?
A. No one goes through divorce or relationship break up lightly. It is one of the most painful and difficult experiences anyone can experience. The idea that something so painful and difficult could be ‘promoted’ is ridiculous, and a claim that could only be made by those who have never experienced it. To deny people – thousands of people – easy access to emotional and practical support, which will encourage them to take a non-combative approach to the divorce process, can only be good thing.
Q. What sort of people are exhibiting at the next events?
A. It’s early days yet, but already we have some great exhibitors. Jane Orr, The Mystic Housewife is next to Jaci Godman Irvine who is a Wills and Trusts specialist – an example of the inspiration and information at hand at SOS. We have mediators, collaborative lawyers, financial experts, divorce coaches (including Vena Ramphal, a holist coach who ‘unwraps the gifts of passion’), photographers and support groups, and of course the the interfaith ministers who created such interest at the last event with their ‘letting go’ ceremony – which they will be leading along with Julia Armstrong at the finale of both SOS events for all visitors to participate in. A mass ‘letting go & starting over’ ceremony!
Q. Why won’t you allow DNA testers or private detectives at SOS?
A. Both professions provide a valuable service – but they are not part of the ethos of ’starting over’. We are determined to encourage people to break with tradition and focus on non combative ways to go through break up, keeping a healthy working relationship with each other despite some inevitable low points!
Q How can people exhibit?
A. Our exhibitors information can be downloaded from here: Click here for our exhibitor information pdf
Q. How can people get tickets and where exactly are the shows?
A. Tickets can be bought online for only £3 each from most pages of the www.startingovershow.co.uk website. The shows are in London 7 March 2009 and Brighton 28 March 2009, both at the lovely Hilton Metropole venues.
Q What are you doing to promote the shows?
A. We promote the events in a variety of ways, including making some tickets available for free to charities or organizations who see the SOS events as a positive HR resource. For example, BT and the South East Fire Brigades’ Union gave out the code for free tickets to their staff which reflects their positive approach to their own corporate social responsibility,
Q Why are you holding two shows so close together?
A. Brighton is only an hour away on the train from London, and for those who do not have enough time to get all the information and inspiration they need from the London event, they will only have to wait three weeks to come along to the Brighton one.
Q Are you planning more shows after the ones in March 2010?
A. I would love to put on more shows around the UK, but since I am a single mother of three with only so much time and energy, I would need the help of sponsors or partners in order to put on further shows whilst maintaining they high quality of experience and strong ethos which is the mark of the Starting Over Show brand.
