Getting Hitched Information Pack
July 21, 2009 by Suzy
With all the talk from Conservative think tanks about bribing couples to stay married (£40 a week – is that really going to be enough?) and cooling off periods, and suggestions from other comentators on making it harder to get married in the first place, I think they are all barking up the wrong tree. Personally, I don’t think we should do anything that is essentially negative.
Anyone with children knows that punishments and deterrents only have short term effect. Why not make it easier for couples to have a long and happy relationship by creating a ritual around the preparation for marriage which includes, effectively, relationship coaching as well as practical financial and legal advice?
Not an ‘induction course’ but more like a spiritual non denominational rite of passage – taking the relationship onto a higher level – with a load of fantastic life skills weaved into the fabric of it. Just like getting a Home Information Pack when buying a house, couples could get a Getting Hitched Information Pack when they are getting married, a civil partnership or deciding to live together.
If you were to create such a pack, what would you put in it?
If I were to make a package for couples getting married, it would include:
1) Booklet on how to arrange a stress free wedding and how to enjoy it by not being totally exhausted on the day… (have lots of ideas on this as I organised my own, on my own, as husband was not detail orientated!!! He just said yes or no!!!!)
2) Booklet called something like “Communicate now or forever hold your peace!!!” Some wise words that are non judgmental and like little pearls of wisdom should obstacles present themselves….which they always do
3) Gift set including feel good books like The Art of Happiness etc and maybe a nice perfume for ladies and an aftershave for men – aromatherapy makes people happy!
4) Directory of things to do in various areas, like London, that are couple friendly and fun and also not too expensive and possibly free (like the museums….maybe even some vouchers in there if the museums agree….) Encouraging fun and discovery can keep things challenging and strong in a relationship, I think.
5) I would be very reluctant to put masses of information on legal rights, lawyers and medical professionals or therapists at this point but an envelope which I might entitle “In Case of Emergency” (!) with for example SOS’s details and some info on what such an organisation provides…..
Well, those are just my thoughts……!